When it comes to marriage proposals one survey says 95% of proposals are made by men, which follows the tradition that men should make the first move in all stages of a relationship ie they should ask for the first date, they should express their intentions to progress the relationship to the next phases of seeing each other regularly, and then they should propose to women.
But attitudes are changing as more as more women are ignoring the usual answer to the question: “Who should propose first?” by themselves choosing to pop the question first.
Who Should Propose First?
Tradition says (there are various theories about its origins) that women are “allowed” to propose to their partner only on leap day, ie 29th February, and according to research, 52% of women are inclined to do so. But that’s only a tradition, it’s not law!
So ladies if you’re in the 95% category of waiting for your man to propose, why not become part of the growing 5% of women who choose to propose to their partner when they wish rather than wait for the next leap day, which could be years away?
How Would a Man React to a Woman Proposing to Him?
You may worry though: But how would a man feel about being proposed to? In one survey of 500 men, 70% said they’d be psyched if a woman proposed! So you may be surprised how many men would love the idea. Many men are simply too nervous to propose when they’d like to and would love the pressure to be taken off them by having the love of their life make the first move!
What Should You Give Him?
If a woman proposes to her boyfriend, what should she give him? Remember, if you’re proposing to propose, you’re “breaking tradition” so it doesn’t matter what others say is the done thing to give your betrothed. Give him what you like. Give him a ring. Give him a present. Give him nothing but your love. All that matters is that he says yes and you can start planning your married life together.
How a Woman Can Propose to Her Man
This is where you can get creative and think up your own way to pop the question. It only has to be unique to yourselves and fit in with your personalities.
Are you both reserved? Then you can pop the question in a quiet restaurant/location you both love to visit. If you’re more gregarious, why not get your friends and family involved to wait in secret as you ask him to marry you, then they can join in the celebrations straight after?
How Natalie Proposed to Richard
Natalie first contacted me to say: “I live in the US. My boyfriend and I are traveling to the UK to visit his dad who lives in Birmingham, and as a surprise for my boyfriend I will be proposing to him while we are there.”
They’d booked to spend a few days at Ardencote Manor.
As you can imagine, it was a logistical exercise to plan the whole thing, as Natalie had never been to Ardencote Manor before and had only seen their online reviews etc, and she wondered if that would be a suitable place. So I made a video-walkthrough of the whole area for her to show a route they could walk into the garden to a gazebo, where she could propose.
This meant, come the day she knew exactly where to go, where I’d be hiding and when I was to appear. This was all planned over Skype and 70 email exchanges!
As Natalie is a music teacher and has composed quite a few songs for Richard during their courtship, she planned to serenade him on a guitar that just ‘happened to be lying around’ under the gazebo. (That was another of my jobs to collect the rented guitar and put it in place ready for them to discover) During the song, she’d get Richard to turn over a series of cards with the song lyrics, which ended with the words “Marry me?”
Their Story
How Did You Meet?:
My friend Cortney lived about 2 hours away, and one night she called to tell me she was in town and invited me to meet her and a few other friends for dinner and drinks. It was kind of late when she called and I was already geared down for bed, but I hadn’t seen her in quite a while and decided to go. About an hour or so into the night, I heard a man with an English accent behind me, talking to my friends. There was an empty chair nearby, so without even looking up, I pulled it next to mine and said “sit right here.” The English man said “yes ma’am” and sat down next to me. At that point I realized not only was he not from around here – he was also very handsome! We obviously hit it off!
A little back story on why Richard was there, too: He had been working that night, so he couldn’t get there until later, but he is best friends with Cortney’s then boyfriend Cody. Richard has known Cody for a very long time and I was friends with Cortney since childhood. In a way they got us together, without even meaning to!
Why Choose Ardencote Manor To Propose on May 24th?:
I chose Ardencote because it had good reviews on Google and the video on the website was stunning. I had to go off of what others said about it as I was so far away trying to plan it all. When I saw how beautiful the buildings were, I was sold. I wanted to choose a spot that had golf and also beautiful scenery. May 24th, because it was exactly six years since the night we met.
What Memories Will You Most Cherish About The Proposal?:
I have a whole list of cherished memories:
The whole planning process was fun for me as the anticipation built and details were falling into place.
It’s humorous that Richard did not want to go on that walk – and I knew he would want to just wait for the next day, but I had to firmly let him know “we are going for a walk”
When we were walking toward the gazebo Richard said “is that a guitar?” then “Wait. Is that your guitar?” and I knew he could tell something was up, but he didn’t really know what.
My most cherished moment was during the song, when he realized what was happening and he looked up at me, holding back tears – silently asking “is this what I think it is?” That is perhaps my most cherished moment of my whole life!
More Proposal Ideas
The above is just one of many ideas on how you can propose to the love of your life. For more suggestions, either for men or women, have a look at these proposals I’ve captured recently.